February 3, 2023
FILM: SEXUAL HEALING
DIRECTED BY: ELSBETH FRAANJE
RATING: 3 ½ out of 4 stars
By Dan Pal
Some documentaries require two hours or more to tell their real-life stories. In just 55 minutes though, the new film Sexual Healing provides an intimate portrait of a 53 year old woman who is wheelchair bound and in need of a physical connection. Evelien has a spastic body and scoliosis and has never experienced a real sexual relationship with another person. She has a caretaker, Brigette, who washes her and helps her with daily activities. She also has a dog and horse that provide some physical affection but her connections to men have been far from satisfying and mostly frustrating.
Filmmaker Elsbeth Fraanje provides many revealing moments about Evelien’s physical situation as well as her inner turmoil. Evelien was born premature and it was assumed she would die very early in her life. It’s a bit surprising then that on the surface Evelien comes across as a very happy, smiling, and pleasant person to be around. Inside though she doesn’t feel very confident about her looks or the prospect of anyone being interested in her body. Even when she has positive and encouraging moments with her caretaker she often still feels rejected. Yet, this doesn’t stop her from seeking to move beyond functional touches to those that might be more deeply satisfying and intimate.
Suffice to say, Evelien is a very brave woman for allowing herself to be depicted in this highly public way. However, Fraanje shows real care to never exploit Evelien’s circumstances. The goal here is to illustrate that even people with physical disabilities have sexual yearnings. Evelien has a sense of humor and fighting spirit that allows her to transcend her limitations and explore what the possibilities might be for her.
One particularly amusing sequence is when Brigette takes Evelien to a sex shop to explore different toys for sexual pleasure. Evelien’s response to some of these is fun to observe, as she’s never been in such a store like this before or much less seen the wide variety of devices available. When she does make a purchase there is a scene that delicately depicts her attempts at pleasuring herself. While not as dramatic, the scene reminded me of the film Pleasantville when Joan Allen’s 1950s black and white TV character experiences masturbation for the first time.
Evelien is then taken to an agency for people with disabilities seeking a professional to assist them with the sexually intimate side of their lives. It’s a very eye-opening sequence as Evelien interviews others who have participated in the service as well as the potential sex workers she can choose from. Again, this recalls the great film The Sessions in which Helen Hunt, in an Oscar-nominated performance, plays as sex surrogate who helps an adult iron lung patient, played by John Hawkes, to lose his virginity. That film was not as dramatic in its depiction of sexual awakening as Pleasantville was but it did offer yet another perspective on the desires of people with serious physical limitations.
Part of what’s so great about Sexual Healing is the upbeat personality of the main subject, Evelien, but also the commendable care that Fraanje takes in following her journey. The film makes a big step in opening our eyes to the realities of a physically challenged person’s life and how sexual pleasure is not something they should be denied.
Sexual Pleasure had its U.S. premiere at the Slamdance Film Festival last month. It will be playing at other festivals this year. Here’s hoping wider audiences will have a chance to get to know the wonderful Evelien and follow her spirited journey.
FILM: SEXUAL HEALING
DIRECTED BY: ELSBETH FRAANJE
RATING: 3 ½ out of 4 stars
By Dan Pal
Some documentaries require two hours or more to tell their real-life stories. In just 55 minutes though, the new film Sexual Healing provides an intimate portrait of a 53 year old woman who is wheelchair bound and in need of a physical connection. Evelien has a spastic body and scoliosis and has never experienced a real sexual relationship with another person. She has a caretaker, Brigette, who washes her and helps her with daily activities. She also has a dog and horse that provide some physical affection but her connections to men have been far from satisfying and mostly frustrating.
Filmmaker Elsbeth Fraanje provides many revealing moments about Evelien’s physical situation as well as her inner turmoil. Evelien was born premature and it was assumed she would die very early in her life. It’s a bit surprising then that on the surface Evelien comes across as a very happy, smiling, and pleasant person to be around. Inside though she doesn’t feel very confident about her looks or the prospect of anyone being interested in her body. Even when she has positive and encouraging moments with her caretaker she often still feels rejected. Yet, this doesn’t stop her from seeking to move beyond functional touches to those that might be more deeply satisfying and intimate.
Suffice to say, Evelien is a very brave woman for allowing herself to be depicted in this highly public way. However, Fraanje shows real care to never exploit Evelien’s circumstances. The goal here is to illustrate that even people with physical disabilities have sexual yearnings. Evelien has a sense of humor and fighting spirit that allows her to transcend her limitations and explore what the possibilities might be for her.
One particularly amusing sequence is when Brigette takes Evelien to a sex shop to explore different toys for sexual pleasure. Evelien’s response to some of these is fun to observe, as she’s never been in such a store like this before or much less seen the wide variety of devices available. When she does make a purchase there is a scene that delicately depicts her attempts at pleasuring herself. While not as dramatic, the scene reminded me of the film Pleasantville when Joan Allen’s 1950s black and white TV character experiences masturbation for the first time.
Evelien is then taken to an agency for people with disabilities seeking a professional to assist them with the sexually intimate side of their lives. It’s a very eye-opening sequence as Evelien interviews others who have participated in the service as well as the potential sex workers she can choose from. Again, this recalls the great film The Sessions in which Helen Hunt, in an Oscar-nominated performance, plays as sex surrogate who helps an adult iron lung patient, played by John Hawkes, to lose his virginity. That film was not as dramatic in its depiction of sexual awakening as Pleasantville was but it did offer yet another perspective on the desires of people with serious physical limitations.
Part of what’s so great about Sexual Healing is the upbeat personality of the main subject, Evelien, but also the commendable care that Fraanje takes in following her journey. The film makes a big step in opening our eyes to the realities of a physically challenged person’s life and how sexual pleasure is not something they should be denied.
Sexual Pleasure had its U.S. premiere at the Slamdance Film Festival last month. It will be playing at other festivals this year. Here’s hoping wider audiences will have a chance to get to know the wonderful Evelien and follow her spirited journey.